There’s no hiding that I love asking questions. I decided to take it a step further. A little experiment if you will.
In a previous post called “1 Question, 36 Answers” I asked 36 people the same question. This time around, I asked 10 girls one question and 10 guys another question. The questions were targeted at the opposite sex.
This was inspired by a blog I follow, Sometimes Always Never. Whitney has a series called “Five Facts from a Guy” where once a week, she features a different guy who shares his five facts that he want girls to know. I love reading them because it is so insightful and she choose the most kind-hearted gentlemen.
Well, I wanted to know what the absolute #1 thing would be from guys and girls alike so I asked. The girls were asked “What is one thing you wish every guy knew?” and the guys were asked “What is one thing you wish every girl knew?”
I asked single folks (a priest included), those who are dating, people who are married and even one who is married to Jesus (that would be a religious sister). It’s remaining anonymous to gain their most honest answer. Grab a snack, sit down and get cozy because these responses were thoroughly thought out!
What Girls Wish Every Guy Knew:
- To be honest, I wish guys knew A LOT when it comes to girls. But if I had to only pick one thing, I wish guys knew that it’s okay to openly share their feelings without feeling lesser of a man. I have been dating a guy for over 2 years now and he still has some trouble opening up and sharing what he is feeling to me. I think it is really sweet and honorable when a guy can show his soft side and reveal his true emotions! Guys, there is nothing to be ashamed of! Girls will LOVE it, trust me.
- The one thing I wished every guy knew is how difficult it is for women to be vulnerable. We live in a world where it’s cooler and more accepted to be tough, strong, and independent. But the real strength in women is our relational and emotional depth. Being vulnerable is hard. Don’t take a woman’s vulnerability for granted- it is her greatest strength.
- Girls value being cared for in a genuine sense; to be loved just for being themselves. It is okay not to like the exact same things and it is important to encourage one another in growing into their unique self without pressuring a person into being a certain way. Mutual respect is important in a relationship. Understand that there may be days that are difficult as no one is perfect. Either person in the relationship may fall, mess up, and stumble through times of growth and exploration, but to be there by each other’s side will develop blossoms and strengthen your bond. Through this, we can not rely on the other to fulfill ones happiness, but to be encouragers and comforters on each others great happiness journey.
- I think every guy should know that a relationship is a two-way street. It isn’t up to one person to define the whole relationship, but both people to make the relationship real. No one wants to be the only one putting effort in because the result isn’t as gratifying. If both people are showing the other respect and dignity, then overall the relationship will flow smoothly.
- Girls often say guys are clueless, but about what? Girls keep these things to themselves and expect guys to know the unwritten.Girls want guys to know that we find the showing off unattractive but confidence utterly important. Girls want guys to know that it is extremely attractive when guys have something they are interested and invested in besides the relationships they make with others. This would be interests, groups, or hobbies that they are passionate about. Girls want guys to know that being a gentleman goes a long way but being clingy is short lived. Girls want guys to know that being a family man is one of the most attractive things. The line about how a guy treats his mother is very true! Girls want guys to know that we want you to be yourself just as much as you want us to be real with you. Trying to impress us by being something you are not is not the way, it’s by being your crazy and strange self. It makes us feel comfortable enough with you to be our crazy and strange selves too! Authenticity is key boys!
- I think every guy should know exactly what to get their girl for her birthday without the girl telling him.
- I honestly don’t think I have an answer. I can’t think of something that I would want guys to know about girls. I think that the unknown and mystery is what makes it so much more enjoyable. It would be nice if guys could just read our minds but again that would take the depth out of the relationship. I believe God made men and women different yet highly compatible. We were born with a desire and intrigue for adventure and relationships. We all enjoy seeking out relationships and finding people we simply adore being around. The adventure of these relationships is discovering each other’s aspirations, quirks, peeves, character, and heart. However, I guess the only thing that I’d want men to know about women is that, like men, we want love and respect. Each human is unique and therefore, love and respect can be shown differently. Each woman is different but I do believe in the core we, and the rest of mankind, want love and respect throughout their relationships with others. Get to know people and base your relationship off of each other rather than what the world tells you. Just respect and love them!
- I wish men knew that listening to their partner’s concerns is very important. Men do not have to try to fix the problem. Just listen and be supportive.
- I thought a lot about this question and quite frankly just looked at my own personal relationship and contemplated what I wish my fiancé knew. It might not be the most in depth response, but one thing I really wish he (and every guy knew) was the significance of a surprise. I absolutely more than anything love to be surprised and I am not talking about anything extravagant, simple is often best. To me, a surprise shows that they are thinking about you all the time. They know you well enough to get you your favorite flower without being asked, or show up with a burger and fries from your favorite food spot (I’m a big foodie so anything food makes me happy lol). I know from personal experience that my fiancé doesn’t see significance in such a gesture and I think it is kind of sad. Maybe not all girls like those cute little surprises, but I am definitely one that does. I would rather receive a small gift that I am completely unaware of than a huge elaborate gift that I picked out myself (in the many years j have been with my fiancé I always have to pick out my own birthday/ Christmas gifts). I think guys are just too nervous/ worried we won’t like what they got us, but there is no need to feel this way. Just the fact that they took the time to purchase or even make something that their girl would like means so much more. It means that you care enough to spend time on this gesture and that you really, truly know the individual you are surprising.
- One thing that I wish every guy knew was that he is unconditionally loved by God! He has been created by God as a gift and he can live his life assured of that knowledge. He can truly be himself and doesn’t have to put on any masks and/or make himself into someone he’s not. I also wish that every guy knew and understood that every person he encounters is also a gift from God – his family, friends, girlfriend/spouse and his children!! If every guy (and all of us for that matter) treated everyone as a precious gift, our world could be a pretty awesome place!
What Guys Wish Every Girl Knew:
- I wish that ever girl knew that it’s ok to show random acts of kindness. Our society places a lot of expectations on guys to do cute things like buying flowers or planning dates; but it’s nice to see one of those acts in return every now and again.
- Guys are shy too. We just hide it under a macho veneer.
- I’ve been really thinking about this, and honestly, every woman should know how much they are worth to our Father in heaven. How radically loved they are by the creator of the universe who took all of our imperfections upon his perfect self on the cross. You are worth THAT much! Society, peers or those pesky voices inside your head may try to tell you otherwise, but they are wrong.
- One thing I wish every girl knew is that guys like it more when girls have a natural look without a face full of makeup or overwhelming amounts of jewelry.
- One thing I wish every woman knew would be men aren’t afraid of commitment. I’ve heard this from many women but for me, I’m more afraid of getting into a relationship where there simply isn’t a real connection or attraction. Men just want to be very sure and not just sure the woman they’re seeking is the right match, with whom they feel that connection and attraction, but they want to be sure they themselves are ready, relationship ready. I know for me, that’s been important, I’ve focused on making sure I’m ready for whomever God leads me to and so if I feel I’m not ready in God’s eyes then I won’t pursue a relationship but this isn’t a sign of fear of making a commitment but more out of respect to the woman because we know we aren’t ready yet. I’m not looking to date just to date or just to say I have a girlfriend so my parents and family quit teasing me but I want to seek out a woman I see myself having a long lasting relationship with marriage as the goal and I feel if you’re dating with marriage not in sight or in mind you’re wasting your time. So, us men, we care about women and really care about our future but we don’t always show or say it and simply want to make sure, very sure, that this woman could be the one before we dive into a committed relationship.
- I wish every girl knew that we don’t like when they don’t come to us when they are mad and just go silent on us. I’d rather have the girl go off on me about what I did wrong then her to go silent and say everything is fine.
- Women in my life should know that they are appreciated, respected & loved. I have been blessed to be around so many great women.
- One thing I wish all women would know about men is that they’re not emotionless. The stereotypical manly man does not exist. Despite how a man outwardly displays his emotion, he may be deeply affected inside. Through what I’ve observed women are often senseless to men’s feelings. Treat everybody wonderfully no matter who they are!
- Men are simple. But not in a bad way, most of the time we don’t care near as much as you think we do: if you want us to do something just say it straight up and 95% of the time we will do it no questions asked. Just be honest and blunt and we will respect what you ask of us. Just don’t expect us to pick up on subtle hints unless you hint at them repeatedly.
- Dearest ladies, I wish… it were a simple matter to answer this question, but I believe any one thing a girl should know is intrinsically tied to what a guy must do. Words are not enough, you see? It is not enough for a guy to say “I love you” without living a selfless life that demonstrates the sacrifice which love requires of him. St. Pope John Paul II once said, “God has assigned as a duty to every man the dignity of every woman.” With that said, ladies, the first thing I want to say is I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all the times guys used you, hurt you, broke your hearts, and failed to protect your purity and dignity. I’m sorry for when guys said empty “I love yous” or gave thoughtless (or conniving) compliments in expectation of getting something in return. Contrariwise, I am sorry for when we failed to give you any affirmations whatsoever – we are blinded by a culture that emphasizes superficial “beauty,” and so, we never knew or cared to notice you for who you really are… Read more here